ending of a very long conversation about our weight loss goals
Me: Well, you do you, honey.
Husband: I'll do me.
pause
Three times a week.
Me: For your prostate health.
Husband: Right. I'm gonna google that.
GODDAMN IT GOOGLE!
Google should know me well enough by now to know that when I type in "masturbation" it shouldn't suggest "is a sin" to finish it!
BTW- in case you were wondering, a man who ejaculates 21 times per month enjoys a 33% reduction in prostate cancer compared to a man who only ejaculates 4-7 times a month.