Husband: So when I finished making Lil Fellla's breakfast I went to make coffee and discovered.... "FUCK I'm out! Thats ok, I'll just make some hot water and make some tea."
Let me tell you something
TEA PISSES ME OFF!
Me: LOL, make some red bull in the sodastream then.
Husband: Tea makes me want to punch people who can't grow up and drink coffee like a fucking adult.
I was going through the kitchen like some sort of tired angry bear. But I got lucky and found that instant starbucks stuff. It's better than fucking tea.
Me: Well Lil' Fella got up and dressed by herself so that should make you happy!
Husband: "Ohhhh look at me I'm fuckface McHipster! I drink the worlds most popular drink because coffee is too mainstream! Oh and I like to play with teabags!"
I'm adding tea to my list of movements I am against! So it's number 2.
Me: Oh sweetie, drink your instant coffee and calm down. It'll all be ok in a few minutes.