More antics at work

Husband: So I got a talking to after work today.

Me: About what?

Husband: I was asked to be more polite to my fellow workers. With the stress of the job and being deployed they don't need to also deal with extra stress of me "talking down to them". So I told that boss to either stop hiring retards that can't learn a simple job I can teach my 3 year old to do (VERY well I might add) or train them better so I don't have to correct them constantly.

Me: Did someone complain? I thought you guys were all assholes.

Husband: No, no one complained. He just overheard me telling someone they should go play on the runway when a big plane is landing so they can end it all because they are too retarded to live life another day.

Me: Um, that might be a little harsh honey.

Husband: Then I told the same guy I wanted to call his mom and tell her she made the wrong choice when she was ..... yeah you wouldn't like what I said.

Me: Yeah, you might want to lay off a bit. There's constructive criticism and then there's saying shit just to hurt someone's feelings. 

Husband: Maybe that guy should learn his freaking job and not have me correct the SAME GD issue more than once a day!

It's ok. I know how to treat him when he does well. I'm very kind. I pat him on his head, give him a treat and say "who's a good boy... that's right you're a good boy!" That's far past the amount of care I should put into these guys, but hey I want to make them feel better about themselves.

Me: Aren't there other options besides belittling him? Like writing him up or reporting serious training deficiencies to your supervisors?

Husband: Oh I have to belittle him. I have to do it to everyone. Do you know what you turn into if you have a huge ego at this job??

ME!