Husband: So how did you get deep fried by that shitty ball of light in the sky?
Husband: Lol, well honey try not to be such a hoe sometimes and you won't get burned.
Me: Well I had to hoe over the whole garden expansion. It was a lot.
Husband: Lol, you're such a hoe.
Oh, I found another tree I want to buy. A fruit salad tree (yes it's a real thing)
Me: Those are just grafted branches, there's nothing all that special about them.
Husband: SONOFABITCH! THE INTERNETS LIED TO ME?!